Tuesday, June 05, 2012
Army..
When the COAS says that his DoB is recorded wrongly and takes the matter to the media and once again, leaving the finest outfit there is, having to listen to stupid talk from all and sundry, I wonder who is right. My own view is that the COAS has diminished the stature of the Army.
The Army has always been a slight mystery to most guys. People have always wondered what lies beyond the “Maharana Pratap Dwar” or the “Twin tanks”. Now with it being a free for all, the Army has lost the sheen. I do not think that transparency to this extent is good. Taking this further, the op plans of a strike corps may get debated on National television…and no one to sway for the leak!
I once had the privilege of working for a COAS. I was his slide maker and the slides I made were used for presentation at the highest levels…PM, RM and CCPA. During that tenure, I had a chance to be present even in forums where Maj Gens where not allowed (but they could not do without a guy to run the slides in sync with the presentations!) At that time, I have seen the three service chiefs do a lot of plain talking to the then PM. The bluntness and strong words used were not something I expected at that level (having been subjected to the usual junior officer talk about our Generals being spineless). I was most impressed by the then CAS. He told the PM (and this is not hearsay), “….if there is a war between now and Dec, we will win, after that we will lose” and “…give me the money you are giving this guy (pointing at then the SA to RM)), and I will buy a few aircrafts, this guy is pouring the money down the drain”. The COAS was equally forthright. My regard for the higher echelons increased exponentially after this tenure and I was very fortunate that there was never a need for me to review this opinion….until now! National television is not the place to bid for tanks and aircraft.
Now, after all these years after leaving the Army, the one thing I wear very proudly on my sleeve is the fact that I once served in the finest outfit there is. My family is the Army and guys I served with…and they have stood by me during the darkest days of my life. I know it sounds cliché, but if I am born again I would like to once again serve in the Corps of Signals…easily the best among the best. Will guys who are presently serving come out with the same feelings after seeing their COAS being spoken to condescendingly by the Arnavs of the world….and the COAS himself speaking like a lawyer and not a soldier (My idea of a “soldier” is Jack Nicholson in “A few good men”).
And then…the fight between the officers and men in an Arty unit in the 3 Div Sector…shameful! And Adarsh….and Tatra….and…..
Hope the new Chief brings back some of the lost “sheen”…the Army (and some of us who once belonged to this very fine outfit) desperately need it!
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
Sujatha passed away on 03rd July 2008
There are a million thoughts in the mind....and it is at the moment very difficult to untangle them and get them out in a logical order.
Well...Sujatha passed away on 03 Jul 08 at 2.15 pm after putting up a very brave fight.
Yes...it was a very brave fight....a fight that commenced on 23 Nov 07 when she was diagnosed with HCC (Liver Cancer for the uninitiated).
I remember the days immediately after we knew what the "slight pain" on the right side of her abdomen was. I was shattered. Just when I thought that both my professional and family life was sailing smoothly and we were looking forward to better days, life decided to deal this blow. Thanks to Internet, I knew my wife's days were numbered. She did too.
I would have nightmares and would get up screaming...but it was Sujatha who would calm me down saying she had immense faith in the Almighty and Sri Raghavendra and that she would come out of this temporary [sic] setback to her health . It was really amazing how unchanged she was in all aspects of her life!! I never knew that any person could be so courageous.
Visits to the doctors for reviews were traumatic..and that is putting it mildly. I would not be able to sleep for at least a week before any visit to the doc was due and the nights before the docs pronounce the "verdict" were always nightmarish. Sujatha, however, would be as calm as ever...never perturbed and always optimistic. She always slept well....ate well....and cared for herself in a very dignified way. Guess she raised the bar on what it takes to be called "dignified"!
To me Sujatha and her exemplary ways during the last 7 months of her life have set a benchmark in bravery and human endurance that will be a very difficult act to follow. I was uniquely privileged to have had a ring side view of this tremendous act of courage from a seemingly ordinary woman.
I salute her bravery and have no shame in admitting that she deserves what people of my ilk consider as the ultimate compliment a lot more than me....the title of a "Soldier".
With regards to the brave soul,
Gururaj
Friday, June 27, 2008
Just so I dont miss anything..
Yesterday was bad....I saw for the first time the beginning of the end. But then that is like skipping to the last chapter even before I have really got started on what I want to say.
And what I want to say is what these last few months have been like to me and my family ever since my wife was diagnosed as having HCC (Hepato Cellular Carcinoma) - that's Liver Cancer in medicalese (did I invent a new word?).
What I want to talk about is how friends and relatives have reacted....what the docs did....how my employers reacted...my kids...
And about what I have learned about the disease...
About God...Religion...Astrology....
About alternate systems of medicine....
About other similarly placed people I have met....
About my renewed views on what I think constitutes "family"...
About some really wonderful people who instinctively knew how to support my family...and others who had no clue...
About people who thought that if they speak to me I would ask them for help..and hence avoided me altogether...
About a doctor who was more than a doctor...and the most wonderful person I think I have ever met...
About a very special friend who helped me keep my sanity even when my world collapsed around me....
And above all about a very brave person...the bravest I have seen...Sujatha, my wife.
Soon..
Gururaj
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Musings
Elephant in the room
Well...here goes. The elephant in the room is that my dear wife Sujatha has been diagnosed with Liver Cancer. This happened in November 07 and by all accounts it was already in an advanced stage. We decided to fight it as best as we could.
Manipal Hospital, Bangalore is where we went. It took us all of one day to get the verdict and the prognosis...that's one for technology. The doctors attending her jointly met me and in their own oblique way told me what to expect. Not that they needed to...it was written all over their faces and their body language said it all...the situation was bad.
Now what? Over the years, I have learned that most professionals aren't. I guess this hold for docs as well. (I wonder if anyone remembers the humorous Doctor series of books by Richard Gordon!) But then not having any medical knowledge myself, I was left no choice but to trust the doctors and be guided by them on the course of treatment.
The first thing the docs told me was that the treatment was going to be expensive (not if there was a chance of success, not the statistics of how other similarly placed patients have fared or a word of encouragement on how to cope with the devastating revelation they had just made....nothing....just that the treatment was going to be expensive!!!). Well...guess many years in the profession has made them immune to the finer human feelings...may be they just see a human body as an agglomeration of parts finely tuned to perform a function....forgetting that there is something called the human mind over which they have little understanding and hence choose to gloss over it...
I told them that I am not rich but can definitely afford the best for someone who has shared over 20 years of her life with me and given me two wonderful kids. They seemed relieved. In hindsight, I now know that it was similar to the glee that I have when I find a new gadget...software....car....the glee at being given a chance to experiment...only in this case there was a human life and the future of a family as we know it at stake!!!
More in my next......
Gururaj
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
About Life
I could not think of a better way to begin blogging in a meaningful way than to talk about "Life". And I thought someone had done it better than I could....for now!
Please watch a very inspirational video here
Randy Pausch Last Lecture: Achieving Your Childhood Dreams
Now why begin with this apparently "not very happy" kind of stuff? Well...there is a very good reason....in my next posting...
Sunday, June 22, 2008
After 4 years!!
But first I need to crack a couple of technicalities and make sure I get it right..
Gururaj
Thursday, December 30, 2004
Wondering what this was!!
Needed to know how it works...so here I am...
More on the way..
- Gururaj
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